


On Clipped Wings

by Hanatamago



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Balthuri Week 2020, Balthus's heterosexuality is a glass canon, Canon-Typical Violence, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Unspecified Route, Yuri is a glass cannon, battle at gronder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:55:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25673146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hanatamago/pseuds/Hanatamago
Summary: Yuri is fragile, and his trust is doubly so. Balthus has one job on the battlefield - keeping Yuri safe while he does the important stuff. When a side objective goes wrong, the two are forced to retreat, and Balthus uses everything he has to keep Yuri alive.Balthuri Week 2020 - Day 1: Past/Healing
Relationships: Balthazar von Adalbrecht | Balthus von Albrecht/Yuris Leclair | Yuri Leclerc
Comments: 14
Kudos: 62
Collections: Balthuri Week





	On Clipped Wings

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Balthuri Week!

Smoke rises from the central hill, thick enough that Balthus can’t see the Professor on the other side. Can’t even see their fliers. It’s impossible to say how long the battle had gone on for, but it seems like ages. And it must be, if even _his_ bones are starting to ache. But the weariness only makes him go a little harder. It means they’ve gotta be getting close to the end now, so the losing folks will start to get desperate. And desperate means dangerous.

They cut a pretty clean path down the field - Professor’s orders. He and Yuri got a special mission to go loot some chest tucked away behind the palisades. Well, to be specific, that’s Yuri’s mission. His mission is to keep Yuri safe, no matter what. That’s what he’d be doing anyway, but the Professor probably wanted to make extra sure he’d get back safe and sound. Without Yuri, there’s no way they’d have even made it this far.

It’s gotta be over soon. Yuri got to the chest no problem, but it’s the trek back that’s being difficult. The field is wrecked to hell. Fallen soldiers and crumbled barriers scatter across the plains. The place is a minefield of shattered arrows blades half-stuck in the ground. The smoke makes matters even worse.

Still, the battlefield looks awful crowded for this to be ending anytime soon. He’s punched out a couple dozen men at this point, but they just keep coming. Balthus steadies his hand on a short axe, waiting for the next guy to try his luck.

They make it a little further. A few little upstart swordsmen get cuts in between his attacks. The mages are worse. He’s always hated the way thunder spells leave your skin feelin’ jittery and scorched. All he’s gotta do is keep Yuri safe, no matter how many bolts and blows they land. Balthus can take it, Yuri can’t.

Yuri circles a paladin a few meters away, curved blade raised to his chest. Most of the soldiers have backed away from the palisades. Maybe some commander declared it a lost cause. Archers and mages fire into the fog by the hill. Can’t see ‘em, but Balthus hopes it’s not his allies on the other side. 

He was doing a pretty good job with it too, until the damn guys decided that trying to take him down was a lost cause, and they turned their attention to Yuri. Heh, they can still make it. Won’t go down that easy, but it’s getting a little dicier with each move...

A lucky arrow finds Yuri’s shoulder, knocking him off balance. The paladin takes his little stumble as a chance to strike. Shit. Balthus lunges for him, fiery incantation at the ready, but he’s too quick, and Balthus is too far out.

Stained silver cuts through his path as a brigand jumps in his way. Balthus dodges out of his axe easily enough - guy’s aim sucks - but he’s wasting time. Make it quick, yeah? When the guy swings again, Balthus grabs the hilt of his axe and pulls it forward, sending the guy tumbling into his fist.

Heh, pretty good move. If it weren’t so dire, he’d be hoping Yuri saw that shit. 

But it is kinda dire. He’s out of time. The paladin yanks his lance back, tip stained with crimson. Yuri staggers back and clutches his hip. It’s a damn miracle he’s still standing. Balthus feels a bit of his dread ease up. Yuri summons a sharp gust of wind between his palms. Balthus knows that look on him - it’s the angry look, the _real_ angry look.

Yuri fires the gale off with everything he’s got. Cuts the guy’s arm clean off, and he’s gone before he falls off the horse. Goddess, the guy can be scary as hell when he needs to be…

Focus, pal.

The paladin’s horse spooks and runs off, dragging its rider through the field by the stirrup. Balthus shoves another few warriors aside, clearing the field as well as he can to get to Yuri. By the time he makes it over, Yuri isn’t standing anymore…

He’s curled into the grass, all ghastly pale skin and bloodsoaked leather armor. The arrow doesn’t look too deep, but every archer this side of the mountains seems to use the same wicked poison on their arrowheads. Stuff must be cheap as hell.

What’s worse is the jagged gash on his flank. Must’ve been where the lance got him. Blood wells up by the wound, spilling out onto the marshy grass. It looks pretty deep, but he’ll have to take a better look at it later. They can’t stick around for too long.

“Hey, stay with me, Yuri.” Balthus kneels and carefully lifts him into his arms. “Think you can hang onto me?”

He tries, for what it’s worth. Yuri limply clutches at his tunic, wincing as his armor jostles at the motion. He’s not gonna be much help, but that’s alright. Balthus can take it from here.

Golden light bursts out from his palm as he calls on the Goddess for what feels like the hundredth time today. He wills the warmth into Yuri’s leg, focusing on all the nice, fluttery shit that fuels faith magic. Hasn’t got much left in the tank, but it should be enough to stop the worst bleeding. At least, for now.

It’s different every time. Stuff changes based on what you’re thinkin’, what you’re feelin’. When they’re back home, usually Yuri’s the one tending to his wounds. He’s supposed to be the one taking all the hits, so hey, it’s just the way things go. When Yuri is tired, his magic feels like sweet, thick honey rolling over his tongue. When he’s irritated - and he does get irritated when Balthus charges into stupid shit - his magic feels like a spike of adrenaline, or a dash of pepper that’s just hot enough to make Balthus feel it. 

Balthus can’t say what his own magic feels like, but Yuri always says it’s warm.

The way Yuri is shaking now, Balthus hopes it’s extra warm.

In a scarce bit of luck, it looks like the battle has mostly moved on west. The closest bits of the field might be quiet enough that Balthus can slip through the woods and regroup with their allies. He’s no coward. Maybe it’s not the nicest way to go, but he’s prepared to die on the battlefield if that’s what it comes down to. But his mission is to protect Yuri, so he’s damn well gonna protect Yuri. And right now, that means he’s gotta pull what they call a tactical retreat before the guy bleeds out all over the field.

Yuri’s head lolls to the side as Balthus rises to his feet. He’s out cold, which is more than a little worrying, But it’ll be fine. Weak as it is, Balthus can still feel Yuri’s unsteady breaths against his neck.

“Easy, bud,” Balthus whispers. It’ll all be fine as soon as Balthus can get them out.

Balthus moves towards the treeline, ducking out of sight of any scattered enemy troops. From what he can tell, they’re spread pretty thin now - isolated and disorganized enough to take out easily. Hopefully, their allies fared a little better. With the Professor leading the way, they probably did, but maybe not by much.

Whatever Yuri found in the chest better have been worth it, yeah? He makes it to the trees soon enough. It seems like they might be in the clear until a dull, withering pain pierces his side. A second blast from behind nearly knocks him to the ground. Balthus whips around, spotting a straggling dark mage. He locks eyes with the poor guy, tellin’ him he oughta run back.

But he doesn’t. Fool just channels another spell. Well, he tried. The guy can at least go to the Goddess knowing that he didn’t die a coward. Balthus unhooks a hand axe from his belt and hurls it forth. Boom. Straight in the chest - he’s down in one. Heh, well, he tried to finish the job. Balthus can respect that much, but he won’t go down so easily.

Still… The dark magic is still well enough to slow Balthus down. In a short minute, he can already feel the poison start to tangle with his blood… Fuckin’ dark mages, eh? Each clumsy step carries them a little farther away from the battlefield, but it gets harder and harder for Balthus to stay upright. The sounds of battle eventually fade into the distance, or maybe the battle just ends. It’s hard to say. The evergreen forest gets thicker the farther he trudges. It’ll be harder to spot them in here, but he’s got to find a better place to camp out while Yuri heals up. There’s no way he can make it back to camp like this. Even if he grabbed a horse from a fallen cavalier, it’s a fat doubt he could stay in the saddle long enough to ride back through the field.

Shit… 

The weight of his body begins to feel unwieldy. Strong as he is, he’s been going too long. His knees give out. Balthus collapses against a pine tree, but maybe he just needs a breather, right?

Balthus rummages through his belt. The little vial of gluey antitoxin is almost empty, but it should be enough to get ‘em both back in the clear. Yuri first, though. Balthus can manage even if it’s rough, but Yuri’s a bit more delicate than that. Finer constitution and all that.

“Hey...” Balthus tries to shake him awake. Gently, that is - he knows better than to knock the guy around too much.

No dice, though. Yuri’s pulse is weak under Balthus’s fingers, but it’s there. He has to be awake to even drink the damn antitoxin, so it’s no good. Well, hopefully, the Goddess is feeling extra generous with her magic today, yeah?

Balthus takes a swig of the antitoxin. It’s bitter, slimy stuff, but there’s no real way around it. Medicine takes a bunch of herbs, and it turns out that there’s a reason folks never used that shit for cooking. He’d take faith magic over medicine any day, but they’ve hardly got the luxury of choosing right now.

“Lucky you’re so light, pal,” Balthus murmurs. 

Obviously, he knows Yuri can’t hear him, but it’ll start to feel a touch too grim if Balthus lets himself rest in silence.

“I doubt I’d be able to carry a guy like Raphael this far,” he goes on, “Heh, well, also don’t think I’d have to, though. Guy’s tough as a brick.”

Balthus tucks a strand of Yuri’s hair back behind his hair. It feels a little strange to see him dozing off like this, and doubly so to see him so far from the immaculate tactician he always looks like. But then, it’s strange to even think a thing like that. Of course he’s a little unraveled, he’s not taking an afternoon nap so much as weakly clinging to the frail little shards of life left in him. Pretty inconsiderate of Balthus to be thinking about how his hair looks, isn’t it?

Still, he does. Yuri looks peaceful like this. Balthus has never managed to catch him sleeping. Not that he’s set out on a mission to do that, obviously. But he’s earlier to wake than Balthus, and more often than not, Balthus still sees a candle or two burning in the library when he’s heading back to his quarters. Honestly, the guy could probably use more naps.

Enough of all that. Balthus rises to his feet as soon as he’s got the strength again. Sometimes, rest can make you even more tired. Gotta be smart about it - can’t let your muscles cool off too much or it’s game over. It’s a clever little trick he learned in the brawling ring. 

He’s still stiff as hell, but at least his back doesn’t hurt so bad anymore. Maybe his muscles just decided that complaining would be a lost cause at this point. And that much is true. He doesn’t have the luxury of resting any further. Doesn’t have anything for the pain, either.

Still, he’s back up now. Good to go. Or as good as he’s gonna get, anyway.

Balthus could totally keep going all day, but he can’t deny the relief he feels when he finally stumbles upon a little cavern etched into the mountainside. Balthus lugs them over to the cave - it’s barely more than a dent, really, but it’ll put a stone roof over their heads for the night. Heh, looks like the Goddess might actually be showing him a little mercy.

Just a tiny bit, though. It’s a shelter, but not much more than that. The wide mouth of the cave is fully open to the forest. There’s not much cover inside, either. Balthus will have to keep watch for beasts and shit. Though, hopefully, the worst they run into is little more than an angry squirrel. And he’d feel bad about punchin’ a squirrel, but sometimes, that’s what it takes to be a hero.

Balthus unclasps Yuri’s cloak and lays it out on the ground. It’s a bit too thin to be a real blanket, but at least it’ll give Yuri a little cushion from the floor. Balthus lays Yuri out on the cloak, careful not to fuck with his leg too much. Now that they’ve got a place to rest, Balthus checks over his wounds in earnest.

Balthus sheds his tunic and tosses his heavy belt to the side. It’s good armor, but the leather plates will just hinder him now. Now that the fight’s over, he can’t deny feeling a bit weary. Balthus can fight all day and plow through. Doesn’t matter how many scrapes and bruises he racks up, the fight keeps him going. Even gives him a little boost, sometimes.

Yuri’s not like that, though. Sure, he’s way harder to hit. Guy can dodge a sword like nothing he’s ever seen before. But when he does get hit, it’s real hard. He’s not built for it, not like Balthus. 

The arrow in his back didn’t manage to pierce through to the bone. If he’s ready with a heal spell, he might just be able to pull it out and patch Yuri’s wound right up. Of course, you’re not really supposed to do that. Pulling out arrows is a no-no, Battle Medicine 101. If it’s barbed - and it almost certainly is - Balthus will tear a chunk of skin right out with it. 

But if he leaves it in, it’ll just keep twisting and tearing underneath. By the time they get back to camp, there’s a real chance it’ll be infected. As good as the Goddess has been to him, she never gave him the power to cure disease. So if he does get infected, Balthus is shit out of luck. It’s a risk either way. Both options are pretty bad. Can’t decide what to do just yet, though.

His heal job was pretty shoddy earlier, but probably the best he could manage given the circumstances. The wound on his flank is half crusted over in blood, half in grime from the battlefield. It’ll have to be washed out at some point… Heh, this shit would be a lot easier if he had a bottle of booze - for more than one reason. 

The paladin got him pretty bad. As far as wounds go, ugly doesn’t begin to cover it. A jagged line runs all the way from his hip to the middle of his thigh where the lance sliced him open. Yuri must’ve hit the guy with his sword or something, because the cut seems to veer off before it can get too close to his inner thigh. Sothis… Any closer and he might’ve been dead on the spot.

Black blood clumps up around the rip in his breeches. So much so that it’s tough to see how bad it really is. Bad, obviously, but there’s a lot of shades of gray between ‘bad’ and ‘super mega bad’. If it’s deep all the way through, then Balthus couldn’t put him back together even with a full tank. But if the edges of the wound are shallower, he’s got a real chance of fixing Yuri up enough to make it back to camp.

One step at a time, buddy. His little tree-side rest helped more than he’d expected. Helped clear his mind, for one, but his magic is rebounding a little bit too. Balthus will have enough left for a few healing spells, even if his magic is shittier than a real mage’s. He just needs enough to stabilize him, that’s all. As long as Balthus can get him back in one piece, Hapi or Constance can take care of the heavy lifting, yeah?

Balthus goes for the arrow first.

He gently pulls Yuri over his lap and tears his tunic open at the shoulder. Yuri will have to forgive him for wrecking it later, because it’s not as if he’s really got a choice here. Deep breaths, bro. Deep breaths. The best thing he can do is make sure the arrow doesn’t snag on anything. He rips off a tiny panel from Yuri’s sleeve - thing’s ruined anyway - and dabs the blood and sickly green ooze away from the wound. 

At least Yuri is still out. Balthus pries the puncture wound open to guide the arrow barbs back to where they pierced the skin. If it’s not aligned right, the barbs will catch on the skin. Might still be worth it, but Balthus doesn’t want to spill any more blood than he has to. He wraps one hand around the splintered shaft. It’s gonna hurt like hell either way, but hopefully the arrow comes out clean.

In one quick motion, Balthus tugs the arrow out and tosses it aside. 

Yuri lets out a strangled sob. Poor guy. Probably woke him right up.

“I’m sorry… That hurt pretty bad, didn’t it?” 

He really is sorry, too. Feels like shit to hear Yuri hurting, but it’s gotta be done. As soon as the arrowhead is out, Balthus focuses his energy into a searing burst of white magic. Golden threads dance at the edges of the wound, sewing it up in a clumsy, crooked line. If they don’t make it to a proper healer in time, it’ll leave ugly scars over Yuri’s skin. He’ll be alive, though.

“It’s okay, the bad part’s over. You’re fine. Just gotta do the other cut now, okay?” Balthus murmurs.

Yuri trembles under his hand like he might shatter to bits. Balthus wishes he had a blanket. Hard to say if it would help - if he’s shaking from the pain or the poison, but it would be a small comfort, at least. Yuri’s eyes flutter open when Balthus turns him onto his back. Might be encouraging if they didn’t look so glassy.

“I promise this next bit won’t hurt as much. We did the shitty part first.”

Balthus lays Yuri’s head in his lap and brushes the hair out of his face. He stiffens up, which is something - not something good, but something - but he can’t seem to see Balthus. If he’s already delirious… Balthus just hopes he’s not too late.

Fuck, he wishes he was better at this. Healing is pretty damn important. Balthus can get behind that. And whatever shit his past might hold, he’s still gotta be in pretty good with the Goddess to be where he is today - alive, and at least temporarily free of loan sharks. But grateful as he is for all that, he’s never been half the conduit for white magic as someone like Hapi or Constance. 

So it can’t really be about piety. Can’t be about willpower, either - he’s got plenty of that. Maybe part of it is about luck, and that’s why it’s such a fickle thing. It's the focus that he lacks. Somewhere between the heavens and earth, his connection to the Goddess thins out, and his healing magic is only ever half as potent as his fireballs and scorched earth. So when it matters, when it really matters, he has to give it all he’s got.

Balthus places his hand over the deep laceration. Yuri flinches. Must hurt pretty bad to cut through all that fog… Obviously it does, looking like that. Come on, Balthus.

He peels back some of the tattered leather and linens blocking the wound, but it’s still tough to get a good look at it. If he can see the wound better, he can strengthen the connection. Might even be able to clean it up a little with his waterskin. Trying to get his breeches fully off would probably irritate the cut into spouting more blood, but if he can just rip or cut away a panel, that might work. Yuri squirms away and squeezes his eyes shut.

“Hold still, pal.” Balthus reaches over to his belt, rummaging through the pockets for his waterskin. He finds it - pretty full, too. Thank the Goddess for that. Dehydration is a real killer.

Balthus begins to tear away a bit of linen, and the cave lurches to the side. 

Yuri jerks out of his grasp and shoves into him, hard as he can manage. Light as he is, he’s still got enough frantic strength to knock them both to the floor. In a blur of motion, he manages to pull a knife out of thin air and jam it against Balthus’s throat.

“Yuri?” Balthus manages. “...The fuck?”

He’s shaking like a leaf, lilac eyes still foggy and half-shut, but they’re dripping with thin tears. Yuri technically has him pinned down, but even at his strongest, Balthus wouldn’t have to try too hard to overpower him. He could throw him off no problem if he was a threat, but… Is he? He isn’t, right?

“Hey-” Yuri presses the knife down harder, but his hold is flimsy.

Honestly, Balthus probably should’ve stayed put. In hindsight, maybe he could’ve talked the guy down or something but… Hey, he’s still a little too high strung from battle, so he doesn’t waste any time thinking, he just moves. Balthus grabs Yuri’s wrist and twists hard, sending the knife clattering somewhere onto the cave floor.

“ _Back off_...” Yuri rasps, voice as unsteady as he is. Balthus has never heard him so frightened - so desperate...

Yuri reels back and drives his other fist right into Balthus’s nose.

“Fucking _ow_ , Yuri!” Balthus drops his wrist and clutches his face. It’s already bleeding pretty bad, which is just the shit cherry on top of today’s shit cake. “Guess I kinda deserved that, but still…”

“...Balthus?” Yuri blinks a few times, dazed, but at least verbal.

“That’s me,” Balthus groans, “Glad to see you’re back with us, pal. Kinda wish you’d come to before ya busted my nose, though.”

“Shit,” Yuri winces. He’s still got the look of a caged animal, but if the cage was also on fire and closin’ in on him. His eyes dart around the room, eventually landing on the knife. Balthus watches him put the pieces together in real time.

“Hey, hey, chill out. It’s okay, you’re okay,” Balthus says. He’s probably doing a crummy job of comforting the guy, especially given that he probably brought this shit on in the first place.

“Sorry.” Yuri jerks back and tries to push himself off of Balthus, but the motion twists his hip just the wrong way. Yuri collapses back onto his chest with a sharp, pained breath in and a few choice curses the Goddess would blush to hear. Hopefully she’s not listenin’ too intently.

“Quit that. You’re gonna make it worse.” Balthus lifts him up and sets him back on the cloak. Fresh blood trickles out of the reopened wound on his hip. That’s another piece of Yuri’s clothing ruined today, not that it does any good to keep count. “You got hurt pretty bad in the battle. We had to retreat.”

“I remember.” Yuri curls into the cloak and squeezes his eyes shut. “What about the others?”

“Not sure. We got cut off, but it looked like we drove them back a bit. Hard to say, though.”

“All this for a damn shield…” he huffs, “When we get back, Ferdinand owes me a crate of the finest tea gold can buy - on second thought, make that _two_ crates.”

He’s alright. Thank the Goddess he’s alright. Balthus’s chest feels oddly tight, but that much is easy to explain. There’s a reason he’d carry the guy over a field of flames and shit. Yuri has always meant far more to him than he should. Far more than the other way around. 

But Yuri is alright, and he’ll take that as a victory.

“Better finagle me some ale in that deal, pal.”

“Of course,” Yuri smiles, small as it is, “I’ll make sure you’re more than compensated, friend.”

“Hell yeah!” Balthus pumps a fist in the air. Not in full-blown victory - they’re not outta the woods just yet - but hey, a good, cold tankard of ale sounds just about like heaven right now. Still, there’s a long way between here and Wilting Rose Inn. “But before that, we gotta get you strong enough to make the trip back, yeah?”

Yuri nods. Balthus carefully places his hand on his flank. He winces but doesn’t try to pull away or anything, so that’s an improvement.

“Gonna let me heal you without pullin’ a knife on me?”

He rolls his eyes, but all that nonchalance drops the second he glances down to the wound.

“Oh, _fuck_.” Yuri pales. Damn… Shock got him through the first part, but clearly, he didn’t realize how bad it really was.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Balthus says. It’s not a lie, but… Well, he ain’t really an expert on triage and all that. “We just need to get you back to camp, have one of the gals work their magic on you. Think you can hold on until then?”

“Yeah… Yeah, I’ll manage.”

“Good, I don’t wanna have to tell anyone I let you die in a cave.” 

Balthus closes his eyes and lets faith magic flow through his fingertips. He focuses on warm fuzzy feelings and all the happiest memories he’s got - things in life worth holdin’ on to. 

“Heh, you could just lie, dump me back on the battlefield. Never tell a soul.”

“Don’t go givin’ me ideas now,” Balthus laughs, “You know I’m always lookin’ for the easy path.” At least he's still in high spirits. That's gotta be a good sign, right?

Yuri relaxes a bit. It’s been a long fucking day, and maybe he’s just tired enough to accept Balthus taking care of him.

The sun sets sooner than he’d hoped, making no exceptions for the two of them. It’s too dark for Balthus to see properly, and soon enough, it’s cold as hell, too. But he’ll make do. He’s able to get a few logs and stones without venturing too far out, so he sets up a tiny, low-burning fire with a spark of black magic. Hopefully, the enemy won’t bother scouting this far out. Well, hopefully, they took out enough enemy troops to force them to retreat, and they won’t be scouting at all.

Balthus leans back against the cave wall and gets back to work. Yuri shuffles a little closer and plants his head in Balthus’s lap. He’s less jumpy, now that he’s lucid. Now that he knows it’s just ol’ Balthus. Goddess willing, he’ll get enough rest to move tomorrow, and they can leave this bloody field behind. Yuri can go on and sleep, but Balthus still has a bit of healing left to do before he can rest easy. 

He doesn’t have enough juice left to heal Yuri’s flank all the way, but he’d at least like to fix it up enough that he can be sure the guy’s not gonna bleed out in his sleep. It’ll take a while with how drained he is, but Yuri is worth every last little spark he can muster.

He tries not to dwell on the implications of that.

Yuri stills, but doesn’t sleep. His breathing is steady enough, and his eyes are closed, but Balthus can tell the difference. Not that Yuri is trying to fool him or anything, just sometimes, no matter how tired you are, sleep evades you. 

“Hey, Yuri…”

Yuri hums that he’s heard, but doesn’t move or look up. 

Goddess. Balthus knows he’s probably about to say something real stupid. But then, that’s never stopped him before.

“What happened back there - I’ll forget it, if that’s what you want… But if you wanna talk about it, I’m here for that too.” The words feel so damn clumsy rolling off his tongue. He’s no stranger to being a shoulder to cry on, and hell, he’s pulled Holst out of his blues dozens of times, but Yuri is tricky. “I mean, doesn’t have to be now or anything. I’m just sayin’, I’ve got your back, pal. Anytime.”

“Thank you, Balthus,” Yuri says, as casual as if the guy handed him a cup of tea or something, not offered to be his confidante for what sure looks like some deep-seated trauma. 

Heh, he’s one of a kind.

The cave falls silent again after that, save for the crackling fire and woodland noises outside. It’s odd. Balthus spent a lot of nights in the woods before Abyss. Cricket chirps and hooting owls sounded like home, then. But these days, he’s gotten too used to the sound of the tunnels - water dripping on tile, soldiers’ footsteps above, weird sounds from forgotten monastery contraptions - after a while, even that became comforting.

It’s strange to miss the spooky noises, but when they’re out marching to battle, sometimes he does. That’s life for ya.

By the time Balthus pours the very last ounce of his healing magic into the wound, Yuri is asleep for real. Good thing, too. He’s gotta be pretty beat.

Balthus folds the cloak over him like a blanket and sets him a little farther from the mouth of the cave. If anyone comes knocking, they’ll go for Balthus first. He adds another log onto the fire. 

It’s gonna be a long night. Someone’s gotta stay awake and keep watch. For bears, for straggling soldiers, for demonic beasts… Honestly, by the way today’s been going, who the fuck knows what the Goddess plans to send his way.

But the fire is warm, and his eyelids start to feel too heavy. Even his rocky perch begins to feel like a viable bed… Soon enough, he’s out too.

* * *

Most priests say that when you die, you feel the most intense tranquility as the Goddess bestows you with her blessing of safety on your journey to the afterlife. The last thing you see is the bright light of the Blue Sea Star growing closer and closer as the Goddess calls you back to her land, or the crimson-burning eternal flames if she condemns you.

All that seems to be a crock of shit, because Yuri wakes to a cold, hard cave floor and a throbbing ache in his leg. He’s no stranger to waking in unfamiliar places. Perhaps that’s why he doesn’t snap upright in a cold panic and recklessly give himself away.

Instead, he is careful. He scans the room in a cold panic. Big difference. He thinks before he acts; he knows not to heed the rush pumping through his veins.

The cave is, in fact, a cave, not the eternal flames. By the color of the light outside, dawn is only just approaching. Slowly, he calms himself. The fear begins to fade as he spots Balthus dozing near the mouth of the cave and a makeshift fire pit down to only cinders.

Bit by bit, his memories of the past couple days come back to him. Marching to the battle at Gronder, his mission to loot the enemy stores… The mages that piled onto Balthus, thinking he wouldn’t be able to withstand their fire and poison. In fairness, he doesn’t look the type to shrug off magical blows like that, but that’s why he’s such a juggernaut.

They retreated. Balthus told him as much last night - his mind is still so foggy, but he remembers that much. He was delirious from the pain then. Better now, but only just.

Yuri inches over to Balthus, checking over his wounds. All things considered, he doesn’t look half as bad as he should. A dozen shallow cuts scatter over his chest, and splotchy bruises smear the skin in between. The worst by far, though, is the angry red patch swelling across his nose and under his left eye. Damnit.

It could’ve been worse, but… Shit, not by much. Yuri broke his fucking nose, and that’s pretty bad. The guy carried him off the battlefield, gave everything he had to keep Yuri alive, and for his troubles, Yuri wrecked his face. Good one, genius.

Well, the least he can do is make things right.

Yuri gently cradles Balthus’s face in his hands and focuses on a soft hymn. He is tired. Terribly so. But there’s hardly time to rest. Besides, he can muster a little more energy for his savior.

Balthus - who looks dreadfully perfect in the early, blue light of morning. 

Faith magic easily flows through his fingers, apologetic as it soothes away the hurt. The pain in his own body still throbs fiercely, but Yuri pushes that to the back of his mind. In fact, it only fuels his healing further. He’s alive. It’s because of Balthus that he’s alive, so at the very least, he can repay the favor.

“Mornin’...” Balthus mumbles. He doesn’t open his eyes, but he does lean into Yuri’s hand as warm golden sparks fly across his palm.

It’s just a healing spell, nothing more. No implications, no false hopes, nothing of the sort. But what a comfort it would be if he could stay like this a while, numb to the pain…

But no. Instead:

“Good morning, friend,” Yuri whispers, “Feeling alright?”

“Been better. Been worse, too,” he answers with a quiet, weary chuckle. “You?”

“Good enough, I suppose. I’ve got you to thank for that, haven’t I?”

His bruises begin to lighten and shrink. Crimson and violet fade into a peachy pink. Bones crack into place as Yuri re-sets his nose. The magic can only do so much, and numbing the pain isn’t in his repertoire. If Balthus feels it, he doesn’t complain. Perhaps he, too, is too tired to protest.

“Nothin’ to thank me for.”

That’s utter bullshit, but it’s par for the course. He could have run off. He could have left Yuri to die on the field and claimed an unlucky twist of fate. War is chaotic. It’s messy. Yuri even would have forgiven him from the grave.

Of course, surely his idiotic sense of honor stopped him from ever even considering something so self-preservatory, but the fact remains - most would have fled the moment Yuri fell to that lance. Even now, Balthus must know that Yuri can’t manage the journey back to camp, and the damn fool’s solution is to carry him however many miles it takes.

“Well, I’m thanking you anyway,” Yuri says. It’s not nearly enough to explain how he feels, but then, that would be too much of a risk, yeah?

His eyes wander without his say so. Terrible circumstances or not, Yuri can’t help but take in the _sight_ of him, shirtless and war-weary. He doesn’t see nearly enough of it these days, since despite all reasoning, Balthus decided he’d start covering up after the war broke out. Not like linen will protect him from a wayward knife, but it does rob Yuri of a nice view. Ah… He’s utterly wicked, isn’t he? And yet, it’s the least of his transgressions with Balthus.

Balthus would die for him, and Yuri - Goddess, Yuri won’t have that.

But enough of that. Balthus may look a fair sight better than Yuri, but the battle hardly left him untouched. The worst wound he spots is a greenish, twisted lesion between his shoulder blades. Dark magic. It takes an extra spark of white magic to counteract the negative energy, but surely Yuri has the strength now that he’s rested. It’ll only get worse if he leaves it to fester until they get back to camp. _If_ they get back to camp, that is.

Surely they’ll make it. Somehow, Yuri is willing to trust that they will, so he shoves that worry aside for the time being. They’ll make it to the campsite in time. And if they don’t, then they’ll just find some border town and hitchhike their way to the monastery - to Abyss. And if the monastery crumbles, they’ll still make it. Somehow, they’ll muddle through. 

Against all odds, Yuri has managed to stumble upon someone worth believing in. It sounds foolish, and it would be foolish to put his fate in Balthus’s hands. He doesn’t - not fully, not recklessly. And yet, in some strange way, Balthus draws him like the brightest, truest star in the sky. Yuri can rely on him, no matter how lost he may be. He’s ridiculous. Too genuine to exist. Improbable as all hell, and Yuri goes and punches the guy in the nose.

Heh, well, it certainly tracks, doesn’t it?

“Sorry about the other day,” Yuri says. He barely whispers it, really. Not because it’s a secret. He does want Balthus to hear, for what it’s worth - just doesn’t want him to respond.

“S’alright. You got a mean left hook, y’know.”

“Heh, thanks, friend. Still, you didn’t deserve to be at the receiving end.”

“Nah… I did. I wasn’t thinking, Yuri. That’s on me,” Balthus frowns, and it’s enough to make Yuri’s heart ache. “Sorry for scaring you.”

“It’s alright. Just… Instincts, that’s all. You did nothing wrong.”

Damned fool chooses that moment to open his eyes. His gaze is far too deep, too piercing to stand. So Yuri looks away.

“Seriously. If I brought back some bad shit… I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It’s all in the past now, yeah?”

Goddess, when did his breathing become so unsteady?

“Guess so,” Balthus nods.

He doesn’t believe that, though. It’s clear in the way Balthus presses his lips together, and the way his eyes seem to catch on Yuri’s hands as he moves along each minor wound. Yuri can hardly blame his skepticism, but it’s terribly annoying that Balthus manages to see through him so easily.

“What’s the matter, friend? That looks like your thinking face, and that’s never a good sign.”

“Do you trust me?” Balthus asks, oddly quiet.

Hm. Well. That’s a new one.

Balthus has always been easy enough to read. Anger, he might have expected. Weariness, sadness - sure. Doubt, however… Not quite what Yuri would’ve expected.

“Heh, that’s kind of an odd question, given that I’ve put my life in your hands more than once in the last day, and that we’re here, stranded in the wilderness, where no one would find my-”

“It’s okay if the answer is ‘no’, Yuri,” Balthus interrupts, “I don’t need you to sugarcoat it. I know it’s hard for you, with-”

“Come now, Balthus,” he snaps, “You really think I don’t?”

Balthus is silent, and that’s telling enough, isn’t it? Ah, well… It’s Yuri’s fault if he thinks so. Sure, yeah, he hasn’t been the best about expressing his feelings to Balthus, but then, there are so many _feelings_ there. But that’s no excuse. Not if it leaves him so uncertain on where Yuri stands.

“You could’ve left me to die, but you didn’t. Is that not enough proof for me that I should trust you?” Yuri leans in. If he can’t bare the depths of his heart, then maybe the truth in his eyes would be enough.

“I did what anyone would have.” Balthus shakes his head. “Besides, this ain’t about me.”

“You’re sweet. But I’m afraid not everyone has your honor.” 

“Cowards, all of ‘em.”

“Lots of men are cowards. You could’ve handed me over for a pardon and a hefty cut of gold.” Yuri lowers his voice. “I can’t walk for shit. You could’ve done a lot worse.”

How close they’ve drifted now, that Yuri can feel Balthus’s warmth over his skin only inches away. That Yuri can see how Balthus flinches at his words. That’s it, isn’t it... Balthus thinks- 

“I wouldn’t-”

“Goddess, I know that. I know you wouldn’t hurt me, Balthus,” Yuri murmurs, pulling him into a desperate hug. A bit too tight, by the way Balthus winces. “I didn’t think it was you. I was... somewhere else.”

“Sorry-”

“Apologize again, and I may actually have to slit your throat.”

Balthus smiles, much brighter than before. Annoying how his heart melts at that, but it can’t be helped. For an instant, it’s bliss. 

Then Yuri remembers himself. Realizes their proximity. He pulls away from Balthus the instant he returns to his damn senses. Yuri misses Balthus’s warmth the second they break away, but he never should’ve let himself so close to begin with. It’s his fault, really. Best not to dwell on these things, yeah?

Yuri clears his throat.

“Well, I’d call that first light, wouldn’t you?” Yuri nods towards the forest. “We should get a move on, unless you fancy trekking all the way back to the monastery.”

“Heh, rich comin’ from the guy who doesn’t even have to walk.” 

“What, you want me to carry you?” Yuri smirks.

It’s lighter now. The air doesn’t feel so thick. And yet, Yuri knows that Balthus’s touch will linger on his skin for weeks. But he’ll brood later, once they’re back in one piece.

Balthus slowly rises to his feet and pats off the dust and silt that’s collected on his breeches. His stomach growls. Heh, Yuri can sympathize.

“How about I hunt us some breakfast first?” Balthus grins. “Giant bird beasts probably taste like chicken, right?”

Yuri smiles. 

It’s going to be a long trip back, but perhaps that’s no loss.

**Author's Note:**

> And then they huddled around a campfire and confessed their feelings, the end :)
> 
> I have two more Balthuri pieces I'm posting during the fanweek, so stay tuned! 👀
> 
> Come say hi on Twitter :)  
> [@hanatamagos](https://twitter.com/hanatamagos)


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